Notes from a meeting...

Ok so this is significantly less significant than my last post. I can't be serious and moody all the time. That would just be lame.
I was in a meeting today. I decided to take notes. It made me at least look productive. The meeting was over ISO 9000 quality audits or something like that. If you know what that is, I'm terribly sorry. We're in this together.

• I hate meetings!
• I mean seriously, I remember bitching about Algebra 2 in high school saying that I'm never going to use this crap. But ISO 9000?! Come on this stuff is responsible for more accounts of people shoving thumbtacks into their eyes than a 2 hour PBS special where Ben Stein is narrating paint drying. 
• Who ever invented ISO 9000 is a cad. He's also still a virgin.
• I have a packet with all the Power Point slides, Mrs. Lady-Who's-In-Charge-Of-This-Giant-Waste-Of-My-Time. You don't need to read each and every one to me. Well, maybe you should, because you'd be out of your mind if you think I'm going to read all of this on my own. 
• If you're yawning while reading your slides, maybe that should tip you off that this is soul crushingly boring. If your really excited about reading it, then I'm going to question your sanity.
• I have 2 Quality Audits to do this month. Heres how I'm going to do them:

1. Procrastinate until the day they're due.
2. On the due date open the Audit and stare at it until my eyes glaze over; keep staring until for 5 more minutes or until brain atrophy beings. Now I'm ready.
3. Perform the Audit. I'm not sure quite what this entails, but I've been told I've done them before. I'm going to rely on muscle memory for this one.
4. Submit Audit.
5. Thank God I won't have to do it again.
6. Forget steps 1-6 so I'll be ready for next year.

• Crap we're on page 25 already?! How long was I asleep? Hopefully no one has any pictures this time. 

And thats how my meeting was.
Peace